Tuesday, August 23, 2005

becoming a roman

2004: The state of DK

Incident 1: Bombay Central Railway Station

DK: Bhaisaab, zara yeh saaman utha na tha. kitna lagega?
Porter: saath (60) rupaiye
DK: Krupaya kam kijiye.
Porter: Nahi ji, isse kam to nahin
DK: Theek hai phir..chaliye...

Incident 2: On the Coimbatore-Kurla Express, somewhere near Kalyan

Chakka: Dena hero, nikla paise nikal
DK: Chalo chalo main nahin dene wala
Chakka: Deta hai ki khol ke dikhaon
DK: nahin, nahin, lelo (gives 1 rupee)
Chakka: BC/MC, ek rupaiy??? (does some dirty act which is not worthy of reproduction here and throws the coin back on DK, but DK ducks with the agility of a Roger Federer at the net and evades the 'tainted' coin')

Incident 3: Palika Bazaar

DK: bhaiyya, yeh t-shirt kitne ka?
Salesman: paanch sow
DK: thoda kam kijiye na...
Salesman: nahin bhaisaab...
DK: dekhiye, palika main to bargaining chalta hai
Salesman: maana ki bargaining chalta hai lekin is cheez pe nahin. yeh original piece hai aur hum kyon jyaada bolenge bhaiyya? hum sirf utna maangte hai jitna cost hai. usse upar to nahin maangenge..aakhir hum izzatwale hain
DK: dekhiye, main appka margins ka izzat karta hoon, usi samay jo main sahi samajhta hoon woh maangraha hoon. app ko dena hi padega...
Salesman: theek hia ji aap ke liye char sow rupaiye........
DK: (feeling elated on this bargain) lijiye (walks away with the shirt)

2005: The state of DK

Incident 1: Palika Bazaar

DK: bhaiyya, yeh t-shirt kitne ka?
Salesman: paanch sow
DK: na na...yeh thodi hai asli daam...chalo accha price batao
Salesman: yehi hai bhaisaab asli price..aur yeh original piece bhi hai
DK: kisko ullu banarahe hain aap? main original piece bhi dekha hoon, aur jo piece abhi haath main hai usko bhi dekha hoon...dono main zameen aasman ki farak hai....iska asli daam hai dhai sow
Salesman: nahin bhaiyya, aap ke liye sade teen sow pe aa sakta hoon. usse kam nahin
DK: theek hai to yeh shirt aap rakhlijiye..main chala
Salesman: yaar aise pet pe lath mat maro yaar. chalo kuch nahin bika aaj..dedo jo dena hai
DK: (angry with himself for not quoting a much reduced price) lijiye (walks away with the shirt)

Incident 2: juice shop, Munirka

After payment has been made for the juice
DK: bhaisaab, baki to do..
Juice Guy: kahan diya aap ne paisa?
DK: yeh kya bol rahe ho? abhi to aap ke haath main diya..
Juice Guy: aap ne to nahin diya.....mere paas nahin hai...
DK: yaar sow ka note diya that..aise na kaho...
Juice Guy: agar aap ne diya to mere paas hoga..mere paas nahin hai...aap dhoka de rahe ho
DK: theek hai phir, main idhar hi rukhta hoon...aap abhi isi waqt mere saamne ginti kijiye..agar kam pade to main aapko doonga
Juice Guy: (giving the balance) aayinda aisa kaam mat kijiye
DK: lo, kaun kisko bol raha hai..aapne abhi jo bola woh aapke jindagi main apnaayiye...

Incident 3: On the H Nizamuddin-Secuderabad AP Sampark Kranti Express
Chakka: Dena hero, dena
DK: chal nikal yahan se
Chakka: (mutters some curse) deta hai ki nahin
DK: nahin doonga bola na.....
Chakka: (after an intolerable wait in which every attempt to extract money goes waste) #@#@#@# (walks off)
This time there were no threats to disrobe. I would have been interesting to find out my reaction then...

Moral of the story: One year in Delhi (N India) will definitely toughen you. You will live according to the proverb "When in Rome do as the Romans do"

2 comments:

Sharath Rao said...

Brilliant...

A nice boy like me should spend some time in Delhi...what am I doing in this hilly near-midwest city :D

sabyasachi said...

Excellent!
So you have been changed then? a tough man now!